Are People REALLY That F*&^ed Up?



What the hell is up with reality television?

Whatever happened to the days when people valued sitting in front of the T.V. in their living rooms with the intention of escaping reality?  At best, these shows only serve to show us that celebrities are every bit as screwed up as we are (if not MORE!).  And they show us that even lame everyday Americans can get an opportunity to corrupt and demoralize our younger and more impressionable generation?  Do we really want the characters of reality television being role models for our youth?

It really surprises me that people actually watch this mess!  As much as I hate to admit it, I’ve been just as guilty of watching it…at least until I finally come to my senses!

The one that makes my blood boil the most is that one called “Teen Mom”!  Is it bad enough that young women are bumping uglies with some youngsters who learned how to treat women by watching barnyard animals on the Discovery Channel?

You’ve got shows like “The Dog Whisperer”, but if I want to see dogs crapping on the lawn, I can go in my backyard and watch the real thing.

I never understood “Wife Swap”?  If you are going to swap wives for a time, why the hell aren’t you allowed to cuddle….to kiss….to sleep together…to break out whips and chains on each other?  Now THAT would be some real entertainment!

Then you’ve got that one show that talks about people getting crabs…something like “Deadliest Crotch” or whatever.  And why the hell would I want to watch something like that?  Heck!  It might make me so damned scared, that I may not want to ever use a public restroom again.

Then you have “L.A. Ink and Miami Ink”.  The show would be halfway decent if they just stuck to doing the artwork on people’s bodies…but no!  They have to get all caught up in the drama of who failed to show up for work when they were supposed to…once more, we’ve got crap that we can see in our own daily lives!

Then you had shows like Jon and Kate Plus 8 about a woman who pops out children like she’s some kind of a Jiffy-Pop popper or something!  What is there to learn from watching this…that many children can cause a family to sour from the inside out, eventually wrecking an otherwise perfectly good marriage?

Let’s not forget shows like “BBQ Pitmasters” that more or less show us how to cook.  The only problem with this is that we also have to eat what we cook.  And nine times out of 10, it isn’t going to be good for us in spite of just how delicious it really tastes.  Hasn’t it been proved somewhere that most Americans are already obese and unhealthy, if not total heart attacks just waiting to happen?

“Pawn Stars” can be really fascinating when someone brings in some kind of interesting relic or artifact.  But who cares about Elvis’s butt plug?  What the hell is someone going to do?  Plunge it into the ole backside and dance around, rapidly gyrating the hips until the damned thing lodges even deeper, requiring surgery?  And just imagine what this strange impersonator is going to have to explain after he walks into the E.R.?  I don’t know if they really found Elvis’s butt plug…hopefully not!  Because that would just be completely unsanitary!

And “Sister Wives” is not exactly the wisest peanut in the turd!  Any married man knows that one wife is enough…some may even argue that one wife is too much!  I thought that the Mormons changed their policy about men having multiple wives.  What the hell is this guy doing?  Is he trying to get excommunicated, or over-fixated and irritated?  Either way, he always ends up frustrated!

I hope I have made an effective argument for why America no longer needs reality television shows.  If this does not change, before too long we are likely to have a reality show about what goes into the making of reality shows.  And we all know how that abortion is going to turn out!




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