Gets Out Stubborn Stains?………..NOT!

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Faster than a spreading harlot….

More confusing than a loco motive…

Able to leap world leaders in a single bound…

Look!…under the desk!

It’s a head…

It’s a stain…

No, it’s Monica Lewinsky!

This particular former governmental intern, who once had a stain that she couldn’t just Shout out, just had a birthday and wanted to let the American public know five things.  But once the fabric of America gets stained, it will more than likely always be stained. Here’s what Lewinsky wants us to know:

  1. If Hilary Clinton runs for President, she may not maintain her silence.
  2. She also doesn’t like things that the former First Lady has recently said about her.
  3. The relations had by her and former President Clinton were consensual.
  4. She was not paid off by the powers that be.
  5. She contemplated taking her own life.

Please let me start by stating that normally when a person has a birthday, it is a joyous occasion where there is lots of soda and / or alcoholic beverages to be consumed; lots of cake to be eaten; and a certain number of candles on which the individual must blow.  First of all, alcoholic beverages may or may not have had anything to do with Lewinsky’s claim to fame; she should know better than to think she can have her cake and eat it too; some people, apparently, are better at blowing than others. But in Lewinsky’s case, she apparently has an ax to grind.  In my personal opinion, celebrating your 40th birthday does not give you a ticket to unearth a dirty blue dress, that no one really cares to see again, and then wave it around like Old Glory during the American Revolution.  To me, its just plain tacky.  But what do I know?

If Hilary Clinton runs for President, she may not maintain her silence.  

Blackmail, anyone?  Is it just me or, isn’t this how many whistle-blowers end up dead on the wrong end of a rope?  Heck!  As far as I know, I may end up dead on the wrong end of a rope myself for writing this article!  I may end up receiving a bomb or — worse yet! — a toxic blue dress in the mail.  Don’t get me wrong!  I think that Hilary’s head needs to roll for Benghazi, not have her strutting the Halls of Power as the Executive in Chief.  In my humble opinion, the former First Lady does not deserve the Oval Office, but the square one with reinforced bars and a personal potty at the end of her cot.

She also doesn’t like things that the former First Lady has recently said about her.

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that if you get caught sleeping with someone’s spouse that someone is not going to have anything nice to say about you.  Of course it doesn’t help that Hilary has been said to apparently prefer the same gender when it comes to carpet cuisine.

The relations had by her and former President Clinton were consensual.

Many Americans don’t care if it was consensual or not!  It brought an executive governmental structure to its knees!  People from all over started referring to the Oval Office as the Oral Office.  Check out this parade float in Germany:

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This little affair made a mockery of the Office of President of the United States of America!  Many Americans feel that if this fiasco had not happened, this President would have been known as one of the greatest our country has ever had.  Unfortunately for Clinton, I’m not one of them.

She was not paid off by the powers that be.

And if she had been paid off, how the hell would we have ever known about it?  And why the hell would it concern any of us?  It’s not like we get paid a percentage of what she ended up being paid or not paid.

She is really lucky that she did not end up being found dead next to a nightstand with its surface covered by a bunch of spilled pills like Marilyn Monroe who is said in secret circles to have had an affair with JFK.  Monroe got offed without pay for her indiscretions, if these rumors are true.

She contemplated taking her own life.

First of all, if you are religious, you know that your life is not yours to take.  Secondly, I will tell her like one dude told another in the movie An American Werewolf in London:  “Aim at your mouth; you can’t miss!”

So, please, Mrs. Lewinsky, stay the hell off my computer screen.  Every time I see that stain, I can’t tell if it is really you, or if someone’s been surfing porn sites on my computer!

Note:  In this article, I am not saying that anyone did or did not do any of this, but simply responding to what I have already seen and read in the media throughout the years after the Clinton scandal rocked the world press.  The opinions stated here are mine and do not reflect that of WordPress or anyone else.

 

 

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